Divorce is something that is not only difficult for the parties separating, but also for any children that are involved. Children need to have a sense of security and stability in their lives. When parents are divorcing, children often feel insecure and may even question if they are the reason that their parents split. There are many things that need to be done in order to help a child cope with the loss they are experiencing.
So many people try to sugar coat the truth to their kids, and children are smarter than what most people think. A parent needs to be open and honest with their children. If they have any questions, answer them to the best of your ability. Assure them, if applicable, that they will get to see the other parent. If the child wants specifics, be sure to give them dates and ease their minds. Remember, in most cases, the children love the other party just as much as you. Because children may think that they are to blame for their child’s divorce, reassure them that this is not the case. Make sure that your conversation with them are not one sided. Get your child’s input and openly communicate with them. Keeping the door open will allow them to deal with the situation better than keeping feelings and emotions buried.
While it may be the hardest thing you do, you need to be able to communicate with your ex-spouse about the children. Though it would be so much easier to just walk away, the children make that not possible. Whether you like it or not, your ex will be a part of your life for most of your life. Remember they love both parties and the last thing they want is to be put in the middle. Stick with the scheduled visitation and make sure that they get ample time with both parties. Never let your children see you and the spouse fighting. This will only make a difficult situation even worse and can stir up many emotions for the child. If the relationship didn’t end of friendly terms, pick mutual drop off points and allow others to transport the children to keep the kids from being in the middle.
It is important to accept your child’s feelings for the situation. If they are angry, then allow them to voice their anger. If they are glad, then talk with them about why they feel happy about the separation. So many people want to use their children as a pawn in the divorce game. A child custody lawyer San Jose can help you device a child custody plan that works. Even if you already have an agreement and one party is not following it, it may be necessary to go back to court for renegotiations.